Getting Out for Lunchtime Ride

Brought the Kestrel girl to work with me. I'm going to get out and ride into Old Town Alexandria today and back- I used to do this years ago but things got busy and I got lazy. I'm still very busy, but I'm making the time. It is important. I need the sunshine too after a really hard winter.

I'm feeling a bit distant from my past. That makes me feel sad a bit, but it also makes me feel better b/c I can function and I can move forward. I'm still processing some anger stuff but It's getting there and I have a right to be mad. Some bad stuff happened. I am not going to forget it. I will forgive, but I'm not going to forget. My forgiving is going to come when it comes and it's not something I need to do or worry about right now.

Five Favorite Things
1. having an open mind
2. being okay with the crisis management stuff
3. that it is sunny outside
4. that things are moving along
5. being at this point in time, already weathering the worst part of the storm.

Rain Rain Rain Rain

It's really raining hard outside. I did brave the rain yesterday for a brief ride but it is raining too hard today. Disappointed.

It was an interesting weekend- still happening clearly. Saw a great movie yesterday: Grand Budapest Hotel. I highly recommend it.

Five Favorite Things:
1. warm covers
2. a snuggly bulldog
3. feeling less sad each day
4. being okay with a bit of uncertainty
5. not missing the past quite as much

Lining Up the Season

I signed up for two metric rides in April-- a little ambitious. http://www.cecillandtrust.org/ Cycle for Cecil- which is a charity ride to fund the Cecil County Land Trust-- (i basically picked it b/c it is fairly flat) this is on Saturday April 26. Then -- (b/c i am insane) I signed up for this: the Draw For Life Poker Ride on April 27- which is in Kent County (again flat) http://chestertownlions.org/DFSonline%20registration_2014.pdf. It will be a biking weekend.

My plans are to get in as many rides as possible.

I'm feeling Okay today. I had a good night's sleep again!!! Love that I can sleep now. I'm drinking a decaf cup of Joe right now. I figured out how to fix my coffee maker on my own-- independence is a good thing.

Anyway, I've had some learning experiences. I can't say I'm completely educated but certainly a work in progress. Now it's time to stop putting important things on the back burner. All my work goes up this friday- gotta figure out how to get it there on my own. I will. I can do a lot of things on my own and be okay with that. It's only been a few months, but I'm feeling more and more myself and I'm happy about that. and also sad. I miss that I loved someone but that's okay.

Five Favorite Things
1. owning the day (first up at 4:45 and okay with that)
2. that little black dresses are little black dresses
3. that I can look back and have a better understanding of why certain things happen
4. that the third weekend in April will be packed with cycling- something I love to do
5. that the REI clothes I bought look great.

In the Full Swing

Wow, I've been so distracted by things. A week after a bad concussion and it's hard to get focused on what matters. My art goes up this Friday! I'm not even done with any of my new pieces.

I'm going to hustle and finish this big landscape tonight!

I did not get up in time to swim today. I'm going to take a break. Maybe do spin at lunch but I might just take a recovery day today and be cool. There is snow on the ground -- again. This has been a really snowy winter and frankly, its spring. The snow needs to stop.

Five Favorite Things
1. this comfy bed
2. another great night of sleep
3. a really good opportunity with this art show
4. not being so sad
5. the end of some things and the start of new things

Up Up and Away

Yay, today I did not oversleep. Woke up (sans alarm clock) at 4:45 a.m. after a really peaceful fabulous sleep, out of bed, swim suit on and to the YMCA.

I swam in the fast lane again (I like the scenery). Swam a mile in 36 minutes, not great but getting there. I feel pretty good today. I had a really good weekend and I actually managed to get out on the bike some and that is good. Last evening after work I slipped in a ride and it was a little chilly, but that's okay. I think it got colder as I rode. I felt pretty chilled afterward for a while and had to take a hot bath.

So I heard some interesting stories and background about people over the weekend and it's been making me think about a lot of things. I can think better now that the concussion seems to be abating. This thing where people walk around with guilt and grief--- it really consumes you and it keeps you from being able to connect with people, be loved and love back in a way that works. I've been walking around with grief now for 28 years. I'm trying to learn how to let go of it and be more engaged in a healthy way with people but it's hard to do that. Sometimes the grief you have is all that you have left of a person so you hold it really tight and it keeps you from holding anything else. It seems so logical when you look at someone's life other than your own and you can see what they are doing and how it has impacted their relationships. But when it comes to me, well, I don't have that same perspective. Anyway, I know I'm being a bit vague but I will say this:

Atonement comes from forgiving yourself.

Five Favorite Things:
1. not being too disappointed, but kindof disappointed
2. getting faster on my bike- I rode 18+ yesterday (mainly b/c it was really cold)
3. not missing my opportunity to swim
4. yay! I'm sleeping again. It's been more than six months and I'm sleeping. Sleep is wonderful
5. my house is pretty clean, i like it much better that way.

Longer Days = More Time With the Bike

I overslept the morning and missed my planned swim in the Masters' lane. My alarm went off at 4:45. I hit the snooze button a couple of times and then turned off both my cell alarm and the cheapy alarm clock alarm- (apparently). I woke up at 7:10, well after any swimming. In fact, the folks were probably already at work by that time!

So I am disappointed I missed the swim and to accommodate (somewhat) I did a spin class today. The usual cyclist guy who teaches was not there and it was a young woman who was not as energetic, but it was ok. I'm going to get in a ride tonight when I get home. I know this is humble, but I want to try and get in between 100 and 150 miles a week. I'm going to be doing this on my own, which is kind of lonely, but I'm used to that. Riding has been good to me and it will continue to be good to me. The important thing is to remember that. Another important thing to remember is that I need to keep painting. I only have a few more weeks to finish some pieces.

Five Favorite Things
1. getting out on the bike
2. spending some time with the brush and canvas last night
3. having a good weekend while I recover from the concussion
4. that my bad headache I've had most of today is easing a bit.
5. that I'll be ok, even with disappointments or hopes that go unfilled, I'll be ok.

OMG!

I'll just leave it at that.

Okay, coming back to this post.

My bike is lovingly put all back together. I enjoyed every moment of that. I got out on it today- first ride since concussion. I'm feeling only a little off but pushing through it.

Five Favorite Things
1. well there's one really good thing I'm thinking about.
2. ditto
3...
4...
5...

Okay, Seriously Getting Biked

can't go into more details than that but it's about as bikey as bikey can be. :+)

Getting Biked

So I've taken some pretty big steps to get back into the cycling culture. I've got some work to do to get my bike legs back, but it's happening. (lots of work especially after a pretty bad concussion)

I've reconnected with folks in the cycling world. It's a great community and there are a lot of really strong, determined folks in that world. I'm thinking about which rides I'm going to do this summer and goals in terms of miles logged during the week. The days are longer now so anything is possible. I feel sad, but I feel like I'm moving away from the worst of it. I'm grateful for that. This whole time heals thing is true.  My head is spinning still, but not as much as it was earlier this week.

Five Favorite Things
1. connecting with really strong people
2. roasted brussels sprouts
3. a warm first day of spring with things sprouting up
4. finding that confidence in a sad heart
5. some sense of recovery from a head injury

Recovering from a Concussion

I still don't feel right at all. I feel dizzy when I walk and the ground seems to be uneven or something. For the past few days I've been walking around my house like I'm on a ship at sea. Crazy. I'm hoping for some good news tomorrow with the neurologist. I'm really ready to get back to work.

I'm trying to detach myself from my past feelings. I miss a life that was just an illusion anyway. I was happy and now that is gone. But i have many years ahead and there will be new and great things.

Five Favorite Things
1. being hopeful
2. oh please, getting better from this concussion
3. having good skin
4. a comfy bed
5. not being completely out of sorts (sad, but not broken apart)

Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

Big Bad Concussion

I've been enjoying the effects of a concussion since being smacked hard in the head with a sign at Palm Beach International Airport. Luckily my forehead does not look like this- it is a big bruise, but I'm dizzy, feel sick to my stomach and apparently I've been loopy.

Five Favorite Things
1. being home
2. less of a bad headache
3. being able to think a little better today
4.can't think of anything else
5.

Away from Winter

It's been very busy here down in Fla. at our annual conference. I managed to get away for a quick ride- I rode south on A1A- to Pompano Beach. I went through a couple of neat little beach communities, Deerfield Beach, Hillsboro Beach. Fun. Saw some huge yachts and some giant houses, but I liked the little retro houses better.

It's been a good day. I have a lot of work to complete, but it feels good to get out in the sunshine. This was a pretty beach. I sat here for a few minutes taking in the sunshine and watching the sailboats.

Five Favorite Things:
1. being away from winter
2. a good day at work
3. a faithful lovely bike
4. 90 degrees and no snwo
5. feeling good

Bike or Husband?

So I forgot to post this. Yesterday was pretty harrowing, as I faced the possible loss of my bike. In one of my distressed calls to one of my friends I was asked- Which is worse: losing a husband or the prospect of losing my bike?

Without a blink-- bike, of course. Husbands come and go, but the bike, that's a different story altogether :+)

Fruit Salad $44

I just ordered my breakfast here in my room-- seasonal fruit platter (which includes nasty mango) and the bill was $44. I'm not wowed.

Yesterday was a trying day, but it all worked out in the end. It's going to be a busy week. I'm going to slip in a quick ride before the day starts humming along.

I have my girl put back together. It only took a few minutes.

Once the sun comes up. (I'm waiting for that to happen) I'm heading out for a quick ride. Springing forward has complicated my plans a bit. Come on Sun! wake up.

Five Favorite Things:
1. that most of the fruit platter was NOT mango (I despise mango and don't get why Floridians put it on everything)
2. A good night's sleep after a trying day spent at the airport
3. A good week here at work
4. feeling better today
5. getting away from winter

Waiting for My Luggage, Bike

I'm here at the airport waiting for a suitcase and also my bike. I'm trying to be calm. Trying. No news about my bike's whereabouts or my suitcase. but the expectation is that it's on a flight set to arrive at 6:00 pm. then i have to dash in a cab and get to my destination.

cross your fingers, otherwise- a: heartbroken over a very special bike being lost and b: will be wearing same levis and black t-shirt all week to conference (the suitcase with my pajamas and sneakers i have, but none of my work clothes)

Five Favorite Things
1. that i always try to come up with favorite things
2. that i at least have pajamas for tonight and a toothbrush
3. that it looks really nice outside
4. that i'm hopeful my luggage will be on this next flight
5. oy, i dont know, i guess that I didn't freak out too much.

Brave Girl Alone on a Bike

So my lovely Kestrel is all stowed safely on the plane. (cost me $75) It was strange getting ready for today's trip. Over the past six years I had someone who would help me get my bags in the car (today it was a lot with the big bike box and two suitcases) and then would kiss me and say "goodbye hon" - Well, none of that today. Just me. It feels sad, but I'm okay. I'm not incapable of being alone. I liked being with someone, but not a false situation like I was in, so no sense wanting that.

This girl's got bike. Heading down to Fla. for a week. The doggy is in prison for a week (poor sherman) and I'm here at this little diner in the airport I used to always order the crab cake omelet, but today- veggie burger and little side salad with decaf coffee and water. It's okay, but not as good as the crab cake omelet. But 41 lbs lighter and looking good in these low-rise jeans with my girlie curves I'm okay. I feel fortunate. I'm 50 and I'm a natural girl, no makeup- no fake boobs, just me and I feel pretty youthful. I think that comes from eating healthy food.-- no processed stuff, no meat, no dairy, all organic, no soda, no bad egg husbands :+) .-- so it's working well.

I guess this is how it will be for me. I'm alone with my two boys. It was nice for a while having a companion, but I don't have that now and I will still be moving forward. I've got a lot of stuff on my plate- an art show, a trip out to Tucson to visit and ride with an old friend, a fabulous time at the Outer Banks with my best friend and my two boys, and then my Idaho adventure. -- oh- I forgot, I'll be swimming across the Chesapeake Bay too-- My knee is doing so much better, so I'm looking forward to adding more races in the late summer and fall-- if time permits.

Five Favorite Things
1. that my iphone is pairing nicely with this computer so I can post this
2. that I'm heading to warm sunny weather
3. that I didn't cave and get the crab cake omelet
4. the waitress who has always been my waitress in this establishment. I like her
5. being okay with no one seeing me off, I'm alone but I'm okay

Sleeping In!!!!!

I slept till 9:00 am (okay it was really 8:00 am if I can't count springing forward). But still, I have not slept this late since October! I hope this is going to be a pattern. I'm watching CBS Sunday Morning. This is the first time I've done this since my husband left. I'm not sad. It's okay. Today is looking to be a good day. I'm busy today preparing for a trip but It's going to be ok.

I had a fun evening with an old friend. It was good to catch up. 

Okay- i've decided to come back to this post-- getting the bike packed up was a total pain- it involved the strong neighbor guy across the street and a trip to the bike shop. 

Five Favorite Things:
1. not being sad
2. sunny skies
3. watching CBS Sunday Morning
4. getting the bike packed up
5. enjoying a good dinner

An Interesting Day

I went to a funeral today for my first boyfriend. He had lived such a full life, so many people were there. I think I was the only one there from his youth (besides family of course). It was nice to see his family. I'm not even sure if they remembered me, but they looked pretty worn out. It's been a hard three years for them as Andy battled a terrible disease.

After I returned from the funeral I quickly changed into my bike gear and went out and sprinted 11 miles. A short ride I know but I got down in the drops and rode hard. I'm tired now, but it felt good to do it. I also was thinking as I was pedaling, fuck being sad. So fuck being sad.

Five Favorite Things
1. good memories of a lovely man
2. that I'm a fighter. I get weak, but I am a fighter
3. keeping a youthful outlook on life
4. a sunny day and break from the snow
5. sprinting on the Kestrel

Telling a Sad Story

I spent an evening with my good friend and I was telling her some things about my life-- some losses I've had for example, and she started crying. I felt bad to make her cry, but I also feel bad because I'm tired of having a sad life. I have been walking around with some sad stuff now for almost 30 years. It's been recommended that I let go and say goodbye to that stuff and I think that advice is probably right, but I'm not ready to.

if you read this post it will give you some context of my sadness

http://joanneinmid-lifecrisis.blogspot.com/2008/03/lot-6627.html

anyway, so here I am. Waking up early. I have a funeral today- A boyfriend of mine when I was in high school and college. He died on Feb. 28 after battling cancer for three years.

Five Favorite Things
1. an evening with a friend even though I'm not feeling so great
2. that I feel a little strong even though I'm also a bit weak
3. that I'm headed for warm weather
4. this silly bulldog happily rolling on his back next to me
5. moving forward

Making a Comfortable Decision

I've made a decision about something and I'm happy about it. It's the first time I've felt this good in a while. I guess I've sortof slipped from that role of being my own CEO and well, now I'm back in the saddle.

Five Favorite Things
1. feeling good about my decision
2. not having everything taste like perfume
3. a good hair day
4. that I will sleep a good long night tonight
5. that tomorrow will be the first good Friday in a long time

A Jet, A Cessna, A Raft = Fun

So today I worked on some planning for my upcoming Idaho trip. There will be lots of hot springs and several different legs to this adventure. I've had to charter a flight in a little Cessna and it's going to be great fun. I'm looking forward to this trip and I'm happy I'm doing the things I've missed doing. I allowed myself over the past six years to become a bit sedated with some bad habits. It feels good to be moving away from them.

I'm excited because it will be fun to be spending a week with energized fun people. I feel like this little trip is pretty courageous for me. It will be an adventure. Just what was needed. It feels so much better to be moving forward rather than looking back. I'm not perfect at this moving forward stuff by any means but I'm getting better. I have some pretty good perspective. I've learned a lot about myself and I'm learning to be better to myself and not allow myself to be treated poorly or be lied to. I'm learning to walk away and not hold onto something that isn't good. That's just not cool.

Five Favorite Things
1. having a great life
2. laughing and spending time with people who are fun
3. not missing that which never existed anyway
4. getting thinner
5. looking forward

A Full Night's Sleep for a Week

It is amazing how different a person can feel with a full night's sleep. It's been a week now and I've slept all through the night. I feel like a different person. I also know this is progress. I have had some trouble moving foward at a decent pace and now I think I've got a good pace going, not too fast but definitely forward.

I will be in warm weather next week. I'm taking my bike with me and looking forward to getting away from this cold weather.

When I look back at what happened to me it seems really sad, but I'm lucky I found out all this stuff early on. It would have been harder several years down the road. It happened at a time when I can re-boot and move on. I'm fortunate under these circumstances. I'm lucky I can see this only a few months out too. The reality is the entire fall wore on me in a very difficult way and I'm glad to be past that. I'm glad to be getting fixed and I'm glad to be moving on and away. I do spend some time looking back and questioning myself-- I believe that is pretty apparent in some of my posts, but I am ready now to stop doing that. I have some great things planned, I've got two great little boys and an entire life ahead of me. It's going to be a happy one free of the bad stuff I had to deal with earlier this year and throughout last fall.  I'm sure life will have more challenges, but I'm ready to move forward.

I was not planning to have my life change so much, but It's for the better. I'm still healing, but I feel like a lot of progress has been made. I could not have done this without my friends and family and without you my trusted readers.

My son Ben turns 15 today. I remember the moment he was born. He was so loud and mad. He's turned into a great young man. I'm so proud of him. These past few months have been hard on him and I hope he realizes that even when someone does something bad to his mom and the family, that we will all be ok-- yes, the world has bad eggs, but it also has good eggs too. My life has been changed for the better with this boy, watching him grow up and learn and grab the world. I could not ask for a better blessing. 

You may have noticed that I have not posted the comments. I've decided I wanted to keep those conversations just between us- the reader/me. I thank you for all of your support. We had more than 1,000 hits last week. I'm only a couple of months into this, but it may become something bigger.

Five Favorite Things
1. sleep, first week of sleep since last fall
2. that I will be somewhere nice and warm soon
3. that it is all going to be ok
4. that I don't need to spend as much time looking back
5. a beautiful boy that came into my life 15 years ago

Enough Already, Just Get it Done

Oy, I'm so sick of dealing with a person who is either a: in a downward spiral or b: in a holding pattern or c: all of the above. None of those two characteristics are fitting to my life. Trying to get a settlement agreement signed and the soon-to-be-ex has been sitting on it for some unknown reason. I just want to move on and get this done. I'm sure you can sense the frustration-- that's only a small part of my day though. Everything else was great.

I started out with a brisk mile swim-- 33.25.04  fastest speed so far this year. Grueling session with my physical therapist, who informs me that skiing is still out for a while. However, running is in the picture soon-- (culpeper sprint tri a possibility). Tomorrow work on upper body and abs. Tonight, well, let's just say I have plans.

I can't wait to get to Florida. I am bringing my bike down and I will sneak in a ride or two while down there. It will be a good break with all the hard work that will be going on.

Five Favorite Things
1. that I am  actually moving forward and getting stuff done
2. that I am not allowing myself to be exposed to anymore bad behavior
3. that there are really nice people out there
4. that I will be in warm weather soon
5. that I ordered some really cute cocktail dresses to wear down in fla.

The Journey

The Journey

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice—
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
"Mend my life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world
determined to do
the only thing you could do—
determined to save
the only life you could save.
.......Mary Oliver

Looking Back

It is still such a shock to me that on Saturday I'm going to a funeral for the first boy I loved. I remember back then so vividly and it was a long time ago- decades ago. It seems like he had a really good and full life and I'm happy about that. He was a wonderful person. My heart goes out to his family and his loved ones for this huge loss and the years they all suffered with him. I feel like I lost a part of myself too. You always have a place in your heart for that first love. Saturday is going to be a hard day, but a good day to honor a lovely person.

It gives me good perspective about my own life. I've got to do better. I need to stick with my plan of moving forward. Let those who want to live a lesser life do so and move forward and away from it. There are so many things this world has to offer and love to be found. I can be loved by someone again and my love can be given to someone who will cherish it and not waste it.


Five Favorite Things:
1. perspective
2. having loved some great people
3. recognizing when your love is ill-placed
4. moving forward
5. dinner with a nice person

Saying Goodbye

Today, I said goodbye to two people. My first boyfriend in high school who passed away a couple of days ago and to my husband.

I'm so heartbroken about the loss of Andy (high school boyfriend) That tall skinny boy had my heart for many years when I was a young girl. I remember going to prom with him, I remember driving around in his little red Triumph Spitfire convertible (which broke down all the time). I remember how hard it was to be away from him when I went away to boarding school. I remember how hard it was to bring our thing to an end, I didn't do that part so well. There was a whole life lived among the both of us. It was 30 years ago and we never really kept in touch, but he was always very special to me. I can hear in my head his voice and remember some of the silly times we had and some of the growing up stuff we did together.

His passing makes me realize how important it is to be kind and make sure the last words you have with someone or the last actions you have are ones you can live with.

Today I also said farewell to James in my way. The way I wanted to do it. He can remember the pretty girl who brought him his boots, his favorite cookies and cast him a big smile as she drove off. I'm ok. I've made peace with this. I've lived a long time with grief. Many many years and it makes you into a better person. Part of being with someone is also saying goodbye. That is the full cycle of a relationship. This comes in many shapes and forms. Sometimes you get an entire lifetime with someone before you part, sometimes a few months and in my case just a few years. There were really good times and I thought the rest of my life was mapped out. I remember being so happy that I had to pinch myself to make sure this was my life. So now that is done.

I'm going to think about that good stuff and about some of the happy things, but I'm saying goodbye. I have to. It's time.

Five Favorite Things
1. the first boy I ever loved as a young girl
2. that I can still remember really good things
3. that I'm okay with being left by loved ones. I still keep living
4. following recipes
5. being okay with goodbye.

Goodbye.

Slowly Climbing Up the Mountain

You may recall more than a month ago I mentioned that I was at the base of a big mountain rather than at the bottom of a well. I couldn't agree more. It has been a really hard, sad, and infuriating climb thus far and I''m up about two thousand feet on this 15,000 foot mountain. That's some progress. Today I woke up feeling like I had made progress. Nothing is perfect, but I realize that I can't fix the problems of others. When really flawed, bad behavior comes my way (from ex) it hurts like a dagger. It hurts like nothing you can imagine. But that's because I seem to always have the wrong expectations. He's in a different place altogether.  I'm focusing on my journey.

Someone recently referred to this Dr. Seuss book and I think it's pretty useful. Today is his 100th birthday fyi so here's to Dr. Seuss.

Oh, the Places You'll Go!

by Dr. Seuss

Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You're off to Great Places!
You're off and away!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose.
You're on your own.  And you know what you know.
And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go.

You'll look up and down streets.  Look 'em over with care.
About some you will say, "I don't choose to go there."
With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet,
you're too smart to go down any not-so-good street.

And you may not find any
you'll want to go down.
In that case, of course,
you'll head straight out of town.

It's opener there
in the wide open air.

Out there things can happen
and frequently do
to people as brainy
and footsy as you.

And when things start to happen,
don't worry.  Don't stew.
Just go right along.
You'll start happening too.

OH!
THE PLACES YOU'LL GO!

You'll be on your way up!
You'll be seeing great sights!
You'll join the high fliers
who soar to high heights.

You won't lag behind, because you'll have the speed.
You'll pass the whole gang and you'll soon take the lead.
Wherever you fly, you'll be the best of the best.
Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.

Except when you don't
Because, sometimes, you won't.

I'm sorry to say so
but, sadly, it's true
and Hang-ups
can happen to you.

You can get all hung up
in a prickle-ly perch.
And your gang will fly on.
You'll be left in a Lurch.

You'll come down from the Lurch
with an unpleasant bump.
And the chances are, then,
that you'll be in a Slump.

And when you're in a Slump,
you're not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself
is not easily done.

You will come to a place where the streets are not marked.
Some windows are lighted.  But mostly they're darked.
A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin!
Do you dare to stay out?  Do you dare to go in?
How much can you lose? How much can you win?

And IF you go in, should you turn left or right...
or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite?
Or go around back and sneak in from behind?
Simple it's not, I'm afraid you will find,
for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.
You can get so confused
that you'll start in to race
down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace
and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space,
headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.
The Waiting Place...

...for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or waiting around for a Yes or a No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for Friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
Everyone is just waiting.

NO!
That's not for you!

Somehow you'll escape
all that waiting and staying.
You'll find the bright places
where Boom Bands are playing.

With banner flip-flapping,
once more you'll ride high!
Ready for anything under the sky.
Ready because you're that kind of a guy!

Oh, the places you'll go! There is fun to be done!
There are points to be scored.  there are games to be won.
And the magical things you can do with that ball
will make you the winning-est winner of all.
Fame!  You'll be famous as famous can be,
with the whole wide world watching you win on TV.

Except when they don't.
Because, sometimes, they won't.

I'm afraid that some times
you'll play lonely games too.
Games you can't win
'cause you'll play against you.

All Alone!
Whether you like it or not,
Alone will be something
you'll be quite a lot.

And when you're alone, there's a very good chance
you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants.
There are some, down the road between hither and yon,
that can scare you so much you won't want to go on.

But on you will go
though the weather be foul
On you will go
though your enemies prowl
On you will go
though the Hakken-Kraks howl
Onward up many
a frightening creek,
though your arms may get sore
and your sneakers may leak.

On and on you will hike
and I know you'll hike far
and face up to your problems
whatever they are.
You'll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You'll get mixed up
with many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life's
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.
And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)

KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!

So...
be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray
or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea,
you're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So...get on your way!

Success

To laugh often and much
to win the respect of intelligent people
and affection of children; to earn the
appreciation of honest critics and
endure the betrayal of false friends;
to appreciate beauty, to find the best
in others; to leave the world a bit
better, whether by a healthy child
a garden patch or redeemed
social condition; to know even
one life has breathed easier because
you have lived. This is to have
succeeded.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson